i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
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