please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
