I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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