people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
