Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
