D3 body, D1 cock
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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