Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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