their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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