im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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