Got a toothbrush?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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