just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
