I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You can't special order awesome
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize