We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
