So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
you traded sex for a burrito?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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