thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
