I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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