Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry tmctucci hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(925): View more from California

i just saw a foot job.

(925): View more from California

porn is incredible...

Fav 5 1730 1197
share tweet
(703): View more from Virginia

Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza

Fav 7 3314 813
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(425): View more from Washington

Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.

Fav 30 4504 1143
share tweet
(916): View more from California

We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.

Fav 8 911 3447
share tweet
(803): View more from South Carolina

if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.

Fav 15 938 3748
share tweet
(214): View more from Texas

Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.

Fav 36 6439 767
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(734): View more from Michigan

THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?

Fav 19 4800 1495
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(492): View more from

Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?

Fav 2 343 190
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(248): View more from Michigan

I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.

Fav 0 53 11
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT