Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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