I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
