i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
