Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
