I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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