this boner is exhausting
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
