im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
