My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
No I am not eating basil off your cock
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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