At least make sure they are 18
Why
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
