their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
