i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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