he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
