I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I use my feet as sexual weapons
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize