he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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