maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
