And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
your room smells of hookers.
And success
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
