I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
