I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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