can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize