My first STD was from a foam party
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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