I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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