the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
