There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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