Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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