I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
