Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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