so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
