How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize