Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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