I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Randomize
