I hope mine doesn't look like that
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize