belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
