nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
