One girl and one boy is just not enough.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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