would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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